Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Smuggling Budgies

We're getting better accustomed to the alternative use of the English language here in the land of the Aussies. We throw in the extra "u" as needed (see Nick's previous post), and have successfully made the switch from "z" to "s". They seem to go out of their way to spell things funny here.

Also, language patterns begin to emerge after awhile. When sales agents or phone service center workers indicate that they might need some time to deal with your inquiry, they say "won't be a minute" or "won't be a second". I was on the phone with the Telstra (the recently privatized phone company) and the representative must have said "won't be a moment" at least 30 times in our conversation. "Pleazah (Pleasure)", also a big one.

One very peculiar twist is when a common phrase is used to communicate the opposite. "Yeeees" is a natural Aussie rhythmic reflex, a drawn-out "e" being used, but the word itself used in staccato throughout a conversation. Like using "Mmm-hmmm", to signify comprehension. Through time, however, we've noticed that when the locals have to say "No", it's "Yeeeees-No", or "Yeah-no". They just don't let go of that "Yes", even when it's definition has to be reversed.

The Aussies also like to shorten names and create acronyms. The CBD (central business district), RSL (returned servicemen's league), LUG (lock-up garage). Don't shop at David Jones -- shop at D.J.'s. Want a Big Mac? Go to Mackers. But it's the random slang that we are now just starting to hear is the most intriguing.

We've come across the phenomenon of Budgie Smuggling, in literal terms a serious felony offence punishable by up to five years in jail and 100,000 (USD) dollars. The roots of the term dates back several years ago to a Jakartan man named Bulgee Pakageo, who was arrested flying into Sydney International with 52 protected birds in his carry-ons, checked luggage and on his person. When apprehended, he even had birds stuffed down the front of his trousers. Talk about having a feisty little pecker!

Recently, The Beast, our local magazine for the Eastern Beaches area, ran a story about the cold winter ocean water and mentioned something about neighborhood swimmers smuggling budgies. Apparently, this phrase has been something to do with the Australian male's predilection towards wearing tight speedos and the 'implied forms' that might take shape as a result. Picture if you will, Mr. Pakageo's arrangement when caught in the act. As the water gets colder... well, let's stop that joke right there.

posted by Peggy C. at 8:26 PM